5 Tips for Making a Better Confession

 As we have been reflecting in recent posts, there is undoubtably something of a crisis in the practice of the Sacrament of Reconciliation. The numbers of people choosing to celebrate this Sacrament seems to be in decline, and yet it really is central to the effective practice of the Catholic Faith. In the last blog pieces, I have attempted to reflect on some of the background things that a Catholic can do to grow in their appreciation of this sacrament.

Today’s piece, however, focuses on what we can do to make the actual Confession itself a more positive, life-giving experience. This Sacrament is an encounter with Christ - each and every time - which means that Grace is communicated to us. Nevertheless, there are practical things that we can do, which will make that Grace more fruitful in our souls. Below are five simple tips.

1. Examine your conscience well. You can check out my previous posts for help with this one. However, it really is axiomatic that your Confession will only be as fruitful as your examination of conscience beforehand: so really give some time to this. I say this, particularly, if you are out of the habit of going to Confession - make sure you do a really thorough examination of conscience to really ‘lay it all out’ before the Lord and His Mercy to cover it all with His Redeeming Blood. 

   

   Fr. James Bradley

2. Write down what you want to say. This is not obvious for a lot of people and yet it will be quite transformative, if you have never done it before. The confessing of sins can be an uncomfortable by its very nature, but when you’re put on the spot and simply expected to talk in a monologue, it is very possible for the mind to ‘go blank’ or to forget things. Having made a good, detailed examination of conscience, I cannot recommend highly enough, writing down what you want to say. It will make the actual, practical experience of confessing much, much easier.
3. If you’re wondering, ask questions. Confession is primarily a forum for receiving forgiveness for sins. However, it can also be a really important - totally confidential - place for asking some of those difficult moral questions with which you may be struggling. If you’re not sure whether something is a sin, don’t just guess - your immortal soul is not worth taking risks over. More than that, though, asking some pertinent questions about your moral or spiritual life will enable the priest to be much more helpful to you in offering some spiritual guidance.
4. Choose your priest. Not all priests are the same, we each have our own foibles, temperaments and characters. It is OK to seek out a priest to whom you feel more comfortable bearing your soul and in whose advice you might feel more genuine confidence. There are times, many times, in the spiritual life when we just want the anonymous experience of turning up at a queue and going to get our sins absolved by any priest. Yet, there are also times, important times, when we need a bit more than that - perhaps a deeper conversation about the underlying issues behind our sins, or perhaps to make a confession of some serious things; and, when you’re in that place, it really is OK to seek out the right priest for you at that time. Get in touch, make an appointment. I can guarantee he’ll be delighted to help you.
5. Pray before and after. God gives the gift in Confession. But He also gives the gift of receiving the gift. Our reception of this Sacrament should be surrounded in prayer for the Grace to do it well. Pray for the Grace to really see the sins He wants to turn your gaze towards in examining your conscience. Pray before the Confession for the Grace to be open in confessing and in receiving the advice. Pray for the priest. And pray afterwards in thanksgiving to God and for the Grace that this encounter would bear fruits of holiness in your relationship with Him.